I'm getting too old to be a hipster. I'm tired of trying to keep up with fashion trends. I've reached that age when hipsters either start dressing like cool adults or give up and procreate. Unfortunately, I have all the personality traits of a parent except the desire to be one.
I'm a creature of habit. I like stability and security. I've never really liked the night life, baby, so my interest in going out is driven solely by my desire to make new friends and meet women. (I remain stubbornly single due to my aforementioned homebody tendencies and self-sabotaging thought patterns.)
Is there anything sadder than the aging hipster? The sight of a middle-aged man (This condition seems to afflict women at a much lower rate.) clinging to the final moments of his window of coolness brings tears to my mind's eye. I don't wanna be that guy.
I don't wanna listen to that sad bastard music anymore. Maybe most Top 40 doesn't have the same depth or artistry as indie rock, but at least they're lookin' on the bright side! Sometimes I wanna grab those mopey indie rockers and shake some sense into 'em.
"Snap out of it! Your problems aren't that bad! I've got real problems! Help me out here! Give me a peppy, chipper, happy song for once, or at least something that doesn't make me wanna blow my brains out! That'd be really nice!"
Teenagers and 20-something's can wallow in that self-pity, because they don't have any real problems yet. Once you hit your 30's though, then you've got real problems, and the sad bastard music just brings you down.
I'm glad I rediscovered musicals during my Return of Saturn (age 27) breakdown. Those also gave me a better appreciation for my parents. (They love musicals and are pretty corny.) I learned the value of what I'd previously thought of as cornball, cock-eyed optimism.
The difference between happiness and sadness can be as arbitrary as one's perspective. Intellectually, I believe that, but it'll take a while before I can fully embrace the concept emotionally.